Precious gifts made of Gold

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Turning our backs on emotions, holding them in, not speaking about them, keeping them buried and then unloading them at the drop of a hat on an unsuspecting victim, is not only unfair, it also reveals the emotional growing-up that we need to do.

Emotions are not scary – not when they are ours…nor when they belong to others. Emotions are precious, priceless parameters that provide us with the obstacle course that helps our growth as a person. Learning to look at emotions as our friends instead of looking at them suspiciously or with fear, helps us learn to deal with emotions and express them with ease.

Of course, the process is not as easy as it is to read the above paragraphs.

A few things that one can do to become emotionally sturdier:

Identify your emotions

Become aware of your emotions

Find a chart that breaks down and points to the root-emotion.

Speak out your emotions

Write your emotions down

Observe emotions all around you

Understand the simple fact – YOU are a cluster of emotions

Love yourself – the emotion filled human form…traversing thru this life.

 

Author – Rachna

 

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You never really understand a person (2)…

Part 2 of You never really Understand a person

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And then there are times when you climb into the skin of another, wear their shoes and even feel where the shoe pinches – because you see, you both have the same contours on your feet. But you still do not understand why the other person behaved the way they did. So you take the advise that you previously read and imbibed. You do not try to understand them any more but work from that deep place of love within you and accept them. You expand your being and embrace the side of them that is hurting you so. You think the pain will ebb and become more bearable. You wait for it to subside. you wait and wait but it does not. Well, actually sometimes it does ebb and sometimes it does not. After all you are just as human as them.

So now what do you do?

Do you keep expanding and feeling the pain and the confusion as to why the pain does not go away when you are accepting someone from a place of love? Or do you put away your pain and obliterate it from your mind and your being?

You don’t do either.

What you do instead is – this time you understand yourself and look at yourself with the kindness that you would bestow upon another human being in pain. You understand your own self and feel love for this vulnerable person, that is you, who expanded themselves out of their comfort zone and out of their pain to embrace someone who hurt them. You did your best. You looked beyond their capacity to hurt and accepted them as they were. It did not change them or their capacity to hurt.

So now you look at yourself with the same kindness, love and empathy that you would feel, when you looked at your child with scraped knees and big large tears in those beautiful innocent eyes. This was an experience that taught you so much about them and about you.

It taught you to expand yourself and accept another without understanding them. It also brought you face to face with a beautiful new aspect within yourself. It got you in touch with you innermost depths and made you do something that is often not easy for us to do – To accept someone without understanding them.You did it. You held on.

Now it is time to take care of yourself.

You evaluate the pain and the consequences of this pain. You assess the other person and see them for the individual that they are. Do not cut corners. Do not give them a discount. Assess them and then choose if you would like to stay with the pain that you are feeling deep within your soul or would you like to let them go.

If you have chosen to let them go, you have made the right decision. Trust your instinct and let them go. Move away. Distance yourself.

Let go. 

Now.

You have done your part. Now it is time to heal the injured ‘you’.

  Let go of the sadness and the sorrow. The space that is emptied in your soul can be now filled with energy and brilliance of yourself and of those who really love you and care for you. Look around, find and acknowledge those who love you and never want to inflict pain upon you. Feel their love and energize yourself with genuineness and warmth.

Give yourself the time to feel. Give yourself the time to heal.

Be patient. Be generous. Be kind to you. Be all that you would be, towards another who was in pain.

Stay lodged … Stay quiet.
Take time to recover.
Take as long as you need to.
The rain will stop.
The howling winds will cease.
The sun will shine again.

And you will rise and bloom.

 

© Rachna Sharma Sirtaj

 

Related reading : Octagon of letting go

Picture Credit – Internet

Wishing you a fabulous day ahead…filled with Lots of Love & an abundance of Peace.

© Copyright 2017. Tranquil Space Limited. All Rights Reserved

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There are days…

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There are days
When I sense a vibration
In the winds
That will change the course
Of my life
The life that I know in the ‘now’.
 
 
There are days
When I sense the storms
Approaching
To uproot and reposition
My being
A being that just ‘is’ in the now
 
There are days
When the tremble of destiny
Forebodes
The roar that it eventually will become.
Transforming
My breath, my being, my everything that ‘was’…in the now.
 
On such days
I hold my breath
And then release it with ease
Ebbing away
The fears
Of this frail human mind
 
Embracing the truth
Of knowing my ‘not knowing’
The abyss of the ‘unknown’ ahead
Juxtaposed
By the silhouette of the new mountain
That I was just beginning to climb.


© Rachna Sharma Sirtaj

Wishing you a fabulous day ahead…filled with Lots of Love and an abundance of Peace.

© Copyright 2017. Tranquil Space Limited. All Rights Reserved

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And the page turned..

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Changed homes
Changed cities
Changed life

Familiar
To
Unfamiliar

Twin Towers to Ground Zero

Home changed
City changed
Life changed

Unfamiliar
Is
Now familiar

I have moved on..

Or have I ?

I wrote these lines when I first moved cities as a grown up.

It was a move within India, from Hyderabad to Bangalore.  It was not my first move though. My parents had moved from Madhya Pradesh to Hyderabad in Andhra Pradesh when I was 8 and my little brother was 4. Even though little, it was not an easy move for me and I am sure neither was it for my brother. A lot changed and simple coping mechanisms were developed in their own unique ways by 2 kids, to survive the massive change. It was a not an easy move for a child who came from a Hindi speaking state and school to move into an English school and Telugu speaking state. A lot changed – personally, academically and socially. But of course when you are thrown into a cauldron of soup, you kinda learn to warm up slowly until you reach that level where you are deliciously perfect.

My second Move was from Hyderabad to Bangalore. Bangalore, a city that despite the initial discomfort became home in true sense. A city that allowed me to grow up professionally, emotionally and spiritually. Life got awesomely beautiful with my little bubba , my son, who filled my days with sunlight. Soup continued to simmer.

The third move was from Bangalore, India to Munich, Germany. Once again the primary changes were the language, social interactions and profession related. All good – Cauldron churning at the best temperature – almost mid way.

A dash of creme and some herbs to bring out the flavours & add the mellowness to that soup in the making. Here comes the fourth move. This time from Germany to England. Unexpected yet known and anticipated at a deep inner level. Its been almost 25 days and the physical settling in is happening.

By now I know that this is a passing phase.

It has been amazingly interesting to stay in the present and know that it is turning into the past.  I literally feel the pages of time turning over and its an extraordinary feeling.  I cannot explain this experience, just like I cannot explain to anyone what ‘sweet’ tastes like. The frequency needs to be tuned into to go thru this experience and that dear friends, is a matter of time.

 

© Rachna Sharma Sirtaj

Wishing you a fabulous day ahead…filled with Lots of Love and an abundance of Peace.

© Copyright 2016. Tranquil Space Limited. All Rights Reserved

Website: http://www.tranquiljourney.co.uk

Articles – https://motivatedsoul.wordpress.com/

Poetry – https://rachnasirtaj.wordpress.com/

Quotations – http://motivationunlimited.wordpress.com/

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Fear – That monster under your bed

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Fear holds us back…more often than it should. Fear restricts us and places boundaries on that, which we are perfectly capable of achieving. We have learnt that it is safer to fit into the contained mold of known emotions, known territory, known work/job criterion. We have learnt that trying something new or choosing something, that not many others choose, is risky.

Safe is traditionally what we do…despite the innumerable examples that we see, read and hear about otherwise. We choose to obliterate the methodology and the realness of people who have stepped out of the safe boundaries despite their fears and apprehensions. We categorize them as ‘brave’ or ‘lucky’. We choose to revere them and say – “Wow, I wish I could do that !!” Well, why can’t you? Who stops you from achieving what you ‘want’ to achieve? Who is holding you back?

I think successful people are not fearless or unafraid. I think successful people choose to keep going, despite their fears. I think success depends upon how well one is aware of one’s fears. It also depends upon how well one understands these fears and deals with them.

It is alright to know that there is a monster under the bed. Being aware of the monster under the bed, allows us to prepare ourselves to deal with that very monster under the bed, and identical ones that might appear thru the night. Similarly it is alright to have fears and to be aware of these fears. Being aware of our fears allows us to prepare ourselves to deal with these fears and other identical ones that might appear as life goes by. Being aware allows us the following choices 1) deal with the fears 2) let go of the fears and 3) sometimes just make peace with them. Awareness is the most powerful tool we possess, towards making a change. 

In the words of the wise – “A further sign of health is that we don’t become undone by fear and trembling, but we take it as a message that it’s time to stop struggling and look directly at what’s threatening us. ”  – Pema Chödrön

So, It is alright:

To have fears.

It is alright to be aware of your fears.

It is alright to choose to deal with your fears.

It is alright to let go of your fears.

It is also alright to make peace with your fears.

What is not alright is:

To continue feeding your fears

To continue staying frozen by your fears

To continue walking a few steps behind everyone else, due to your fears

And

To continue staying still because of your fears.

-Rachna

 

Wishing you a fabulous day ahead…filled with an abundance of Love & Peace

Rachna

© Copyright 2016. Tranquil Space Limited. All Rights Reserved

Ripples of truth

 

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And just like that the dream shattered.

Even though she had suspected for a while that it would, the sound of the crash was louder than she had expected.

Here is the thing about broken dreams. They are not easy to deal with. They crash and they scatter all over, creating a big mess that needs to be swept up. Sometimes the saving grace is  that people understands this particular sorrow of loss. In reality they may have helped bring on the process of shattering or even actually taken over and shattered the dream. But when they see you standing in silence and and looking at those scattered pieces, tears streaming down your cheeks – they sometimes do understands. At times you also get lucky enough to have everyone step back and allow you the time to mourn the loss.

In this respect, she got lucky. The world stepped back and allowed her the space to absorb the sight of those little bits and pieces that her dream had shattered into. Thru the haze of her misty eyes, she could see her reflection, her ambitions, her plans and her future in each one of those tiny pieces. Potentially this would have been a good time to sink into a depression or have a nervous breakdown – like the books suggested or the umpteen number of movies portrayed. It would be easy and everyone would actually understand. She could withdraw from all the pain that surrounded her being, and retreat into the gentle white softness of silence.

She felt alone and unsupported. It seemed like everyone had given up on her. She felt completely written off – devoid of potential or a possible future. There is something about the lack of ‘show of support’. If it does not happen at the right time – it becomes ineffective, like medication that has passed its expiry date. In her case, the lack of ‘words of support’ gave rise to a silence within her being, that she found strangely peaceful. It was a space where she could experience and see everyone as they were. No layers of words to cover up their real thoughts – no pretense of love. Just plain indifference that she found easy to accept. This actually seemed really nice. She liked the feeling. It was akin to wearing no makeup – which she disliked wearing. It felt like being alone  in nature, under the sky – in her minuscule spot in the universe. A spot that belonged to her.

And then, in that silent space, something magnificent happened. Amidst the sounds of her dream crashing and reverberating loudly – there were ripples of a stark realization that echoed into infinite loops, through the eternal vastness of the universe.

She had not yet given up on herself – not yet.

She had not written herself off

This is what mattered.

This is ALL that mattered.

 

Author – ©Rachna Sharma Sirtaj

 

Wishing you a fabulous day ahead…filled with Lots of Love and an abundance of Peace.

© Copyright 2016. Tranquil Space Limited. All Rights Reserved

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Articles – https://motivatedsoul.wordpress.com/

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Desiderata: A Poem for a Way of Life

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Desiderata: A Poem for a Way of Life

 

“Go placidly amid the noise and the haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence.

As far as possible without surrender, be on good terms with all persons.

Speak your truth quietly and clearly, and listen to others, even the dull and ignorant;

They too have their story.

Be yourself.

Especially do not feign affection.

Neither be cynical about love

Ffor in the face of all aridity and disenchantment

It is perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth.

Nurture strength of spirit to shield you from misfortune.

But do not distress yourself with imaginings.

Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.

Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself.

You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here.

And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore be at peace with God,

Whatever you conceive Him to be,

And whatever your labours and aspirations,

In the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul.

With all it’s sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world.”

― Max Ehrmann, Desiderata: A Poem for a Way of Life

Wishing you a fabulous day ahead…filled with Lots of Love and an abundance of Peace.

© Copyright 2016. Tranquil Space Limited. All Rights Reserved

Website: http://www.tranquiljourney.co.uk

Articles – https://motivatedsoul.wordpress.com/

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Making the Ordinary Extraordinary – Mridula Kaul (Guest Blog 2)

A beautiful blog post by Mridula Kaul, a dear friend and a fabulous human being – kind, gentle, funny, spontaneous & innovative. She thinks and feels from her heart and manages to convert those thoughts and feelings to beautiful words – I am very proud to add her writing to my blog. This is the second write-up that Mridula has graciously shared on my blog. 

Mridula, a versatile netizen, is a resident of UK. 

 

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People often say they want to be free. This is the biggest hoax of all time. It’s a beautiful lie packaged in the most enticing gossamer. We don’t want to be free. We want chains. Because chains create a bond with people, material possessions, emotions and memories even. We don’t want to break away from those connections, that would require courage and we’re not really built to be courageous, normally – well, normal people under normal circumstances don’t need to display courage unless they’re faced with extraordinary situations. So we don’t want to be free or courageous (except when it’s founded in a deep-rooted, all-consuming desire for something that just can’t be ignored – more on that in my next post). Happy days! Anything else we don’t want? Of course – misery! So it stands to reason that if we don’t want misery, we must want the opposite of it. And yet most normal people are anything but happy. It’s almost like they find a vicarious pleasure in counting all the things that make their life sad or difficult.

And then there were three – freedom, courage and happiness, we’re having none of these bad boys. Crikey, so what do we want? After much deliberation (many bottles of alcohol were tested to prove this theory), I’ve concluded that ultimately, we just want to escape reality. Because that is ordinary and no one in their right mind wants ordinary. Like good, evolved, migratory animals, we plan a holiday to exotic or not so exotic locales, only the reason is not so much to escape dismal weather conditions but the drudgery of life. If we can’t, we watch movies that transport us to those locales and make us believe we could look like someone special so we then go and buy attire based on current fashion trends and wear make up that makes us look like our favourite celebrities. We eat (or would certainly like to) in restaurants that the rich and famous dine in, reading books about things we would love to do but probably never will. We make bucket lists because we ‘only live once’. We look for perfect excitement outside to make up for what’s missing in our imperfect relationships.

I get it. I get the need for us to do this. What I don’t understand is the extent to which we inconvenience ourselves to get this brief respite from reality. I say brief because like all good, migratory animals, we do make our way back ‘home’ even if that home is far from ideal. It might be out of habit or perhaps, because we know, deep inside that the migratory flight doesn’t have the permanence or comfort we seek. So I say, let’s not be ashamed of celebrating the ordinary. Why lament that walk because you don’t have a car – enjoy the great outdoors instead and revel in the post exercise after-glow; bemoan not that small, quirky home – it is much-loved and sees conversations, happiness and warmth in as much abundance if not more, as the ten bedroom mansion you see on your walk home everyday; be grateful for those wrinkles, they prove you’ve lived, loved and laughed. And if all this ordinariness feels good, makes your eyes twinkle and creates memories that will long outlast what you are trying to escape, then that for me, is extraordinary.

 

– Mridula Kaul

 

Wishing you a fabulous day ahead…filled with Lots of Love & an abundance of Peace.

© Copyright 2016. Tranquil Space Limited. All Rights Reserved

 

Website: http://www.tranquiljourney.co.uk

Articles – https://motivatedsoul.wordpress.com/

Poetry – https://rachnasirtaj.wordpress.com/

Quotations – http://motivationunlimited.wordpress.com/

Photographs – http://rachnaphotoblog.wordpress.com/

Random act of Kindness – Mridula Kaul ( Guest Blog 1 )

A beautiful blog post by Mridula Kaul, a dear friend and a fabulous human being – kind, gentle, funny, spontaneous & innovative. She thinks and feels from her heart and manages to convert those thoughts and feelings to beautiful words – I am very proud to add her writing to my blog. This will be a  short series with snippets of writing that Mridula has graciously agreed to share on my blog. 

Mridula, a versatile netizen, is a resident of UK. 

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As I sailed through the sea of commuters gushing out of my train at Charing Cross, I noticed a young lady make a beeline for the nearest Costa and grab a hot beverage. Her stilettos clacketteering (I know there isn’t a word like that but indulge me if you would), she checked her smartphone and smiled (I could see her cheeks lifting up her lips, prompted presumably by interesting texts or funny comments on her FB pictures) and then rushed towards to the man who sells The Big Issue (the man who stands at the same spot outside the station, come rain, snow or shine) in a way that only a customer who is intent on buying something, would do. At this point, I would ordinarily have smiled at the man as I do every morning, and quickened my steps to get to the office. Today was different. The lady handed over her take-away coffee cup to the man, covering both his freezing hands with her gloved ones. ‘There you go, swee’haaa!!’ she said in her Saaf London accent, ‘thaw you might need thaa!!’ With that, she pecked him on his cheek, gave him a wink and clacketteered away, as he watched on stunned. Not many would have bought a copy of his Big Issue. But not one person would ever have bought him a coffee, of that I am certain. In the world we live in, full of cruelty and horror of unheard and unseen proportions, this small act of kindness suddenly restored my faith in humanity. But then, I’m easily pleased. I haven’t been able to wipe the smile off my face since.

-Mridula Kaul

 

Wishing you a fabulous day ahead…filled with Lots of Love & an Abundance of Peace.

© Copyright 2016. Tranquil Space Limited. All Rights Reserved